We are layers of criss crossing imprints and reflections; indentations from parents, friends, and chance encounters; mirrors when planning, yearning and rembering. We can become whirlpools of conflicting emotions and passions, of decisions and agitations, of admirations and jealousies, happiness and melancholy. When such chaos is overwhelming, we begin to agonize about what we 'truly' want. Yet, once we start to identify structure, we gain a sense of what we truly want, of what sort of character we truly are. To search after something more in 'truly' wanting, in 'truly' being, is to search after a chimera, an illusion, an impossibility.
And, being an impossibilty, its not just impossible to obtain, but also not worth the having.
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